Let me start by saying, that even though I really thought I was ready to announce all the things that are going on here by this past Tuesday, I must apologise and say that I am sorry, I guess I wasn’t. There are a lot of details unfolding.
Call it time, call it the universe, call it divine intervention, call it what you may, it seems that lately I am being put to the test learning patience, humility and being humbled in many areas (funny just when you think you got those lessons, oh here they come again). For as much as I walk with my heart on my sleeve, I also sometimes place so much importance on what I do, or how the world affects me it makes me think that I have learned nothing along the way and that I must remind myself not to walk with my ego, take life for granted and surrender to having no expectations.
Most of you have been with me on my journey for a long time, some of you are new, together we have witnessed some good times, triumphant moments, as well some sharing of tears and consoling. Darren, Cole and myself embarked on a journey some 16 years ago to build a place, where anyone could come, feel welcomed, not judged, where they could find life’s balance, better health, strength, flexibility, solitude and so much more. We called her Ohana, with the intent that no matter whether you are blood related, chosen family or further out into the community, there is a place where you can go where we can help you work towards the same goal, the goal being healthy, find your strength both physically & mentally, what have you we move to the direction that you need offering you and others the tools, and modalities towards a healthier, happier life. So that in turn you are stronger and more able to help not only yourself but also help others, extending the community way beyond the doors of Ohana, like a vibration of wellness that calls your being.
It has been a busy past few years, I/we have been growing the yoga and wellness centre, a yoga program at the NBRHC in the mental health area, as well as teaching workshops, teaching yoga, mentors, and also offering a variety of wellness and health services for the North Bay and surrounding areas. We have beautiful teachers, who have trained and traveled far and wide to offer top quality classes to you, we also have beautiful practitioners to assist you in the bettering of your health and wellness. I so dearly love each and every one of you and feel so honoured to have these people in our lives, walking with us.
Combining these people, their crafts, my crafts, what we can offer you as well as you is what sparks and ignites me I have been humbled many times and whole heartedly want and love to serve you and others unconditionally. After all that is why have been placed on this earth, I know and embrace this with all of my heart.
We all need something for ourselves, to keep our internal fire motivated from within… My heart’s desire is to further my academic education. Like anything that is out of the box this decision caused a panic within me that I transferred to others in some ways without intention. I thought I could not do this unless I had more time, and in my mind I needed to change the structure of what we built and make my classes and times shorter and smaller. This caused a chain reaction of events that seems to have turned a lot of us upside down… time, and the want of more of it, this was a big lesson. So in my panic of trying to “fit everything in” we decided the best possible way to do this time thing was to put our beloved Ohana up for sale so that I could slow some stuff down and make more time.
Now I must say the universe works in mysterious ways… it seems that try as we may, either on the buying or the selling part things would just not work out, and every time we thought we found a buyer or a place to go, my head would start to build another Ohana but different in appearance, but still the same sort of thing. This is when I/we had to STOP, we actually started to look back at our roots. Why we started Ohana, what our goals were, and where did this initial adventure took us.
It was the minute we decided to look at time and how to get it differently that things started to happen and change. I won’t bore you with all of the details but going back to our roots, sitting, surrendering and asking our directions certainly worked… trust in your gut, your intuitive self it has the answers.
So the short and the long of it is this… what I learned (ok so maybe just a few things I learned), about this journey and what we are doing.
Over the summer and part of the fall I taught shorter classes, and more of them. As a result I have decided to no longer do this as its not in alignment with my true self and or the type of restorative class I truly believe most beneficial. There are classes that are good at the 1hr mark, but in my opinion not my restorative class. Why? Because I love to learn, get to know, and help my students to the best of my ability… I have been taught by my yoga masters in India that a traditional class should be 1.5 to 2 hrs in order for the practitioner to obtain the benefits to the fullest…. Through trial and error and probably a big “I told you so from my teachers”… I now totally and full heartedly agree. Ahimsa – there is a do no harm rule, the harm was not physical, but as a teacher it was breaking my heart to not be able to take the time and get to know what was going on and how to help more efficiently… when Ahimsa is practised on and off the mat it brings a humbling balance to life. So now I know that the 1.5 class is where I want to teach. I am worth it as a teacher, and you are most definitely worth it as the practitioner.
I also learned that I do not need to sell and start new, I just need to trust the universe and that what is needed will come my way. Getting too wrapped up into the business world worrying about what if classes slow down, what if we are not bringing in as many people. If my graphics business slows down how will we pay the bills and keep Ohana… I’m sure you get the pressure that I felt and sometimes slip into. STRESS Sucks! The main reason why I wanted a studio in the first place was to share and give back the gifts I learned that helped me when I was so sick and did not know where to start. We have succeeded with the goal, time and time again. People come people go, then they come back or they move on. Looking at my roots as a business causes me to form an attachment to something I never started out to have in the first place. Do we need money to pay the bills yes, to survive yes, but we have done so, we know what we need and how much, so now we are looking for someone who needs as well. A second phase of Ohana, so to speak someone or a few that come in and man this beautiful big blue vessel, not even in the exact same way, because like the tide we ebb and flow and so does she, she has been built to be multipurpose and she has showed us this many times.
My hopes are that we find one, two or maybe a few energetic, bright, fun loving people to help us populate and manage the spaces that Ohana has to offer. The monetary exchange will be worked out, and based totally on the needs of each of us. The possibilities can be endless, and I believe this will give me the time that I need. So I guess I am looking to surrender my hold of the ship. Of course I will be here to guide and support, but for the most part I want the others or other to take charge, add your vision to ours see what you can build. We have the space, we want your time and energy, in exchange we will give you ours and the rest will all work out.
So when things get muddled and it takes some time to sort out life, allow the process to take place, don’t fight it like I did, allow so that you can move forward and see things clearly. Once you do it is always a good time to celebrate what you have, what you have learned and what you are about to create (with help). To move forward with a new vision a we feel that a party and wellness day celebration is in order… and of course keeping in the tradition of Ohana it will also be a fundraiser. After all our roots are what created us and where we stand at this very moment in time. I did find it funny how the opportunity to have “Hidden Roots” play at Ohana was another play that the universe brought to us… love the universe!
We do good things, we have helped many, we will continue to serve to the best of our abilities always reaching for the highest greater good, the best that we can, and as the saying goes … if we don’t know the answer we will find them or we will surrender (say THANK YOU) to whatever comes our way and humbly rejoice in what will be.
We started our journey, by our gut intuitions, calling to the universe, for the betterment of others, believing that our hearts will guide us in the right direction! For this we stay true, if you are struggling with something, may you remember in times when you are having difficulties, look back (but don’t linger) before you step forward… look back, surrender (say THANK YOU), ask, surrender (say THANK YOU again), allow, and move forward.
Love light to you all and see you at the party if not before on the mat!
Ps, come hell or high water I start school in January, and will happily be remaining “under our roof”.