I believe there is potential for continued happiness in us all, we just need to recognize it. I also believe that every life event can be fulfilling.
Happiness and contentment where does one find it? There is no secret recipe for happiness at least I have not found one. Yet we continuously search for what the magic combination is to unlock the feeling of happiness and contentment. I have witnessed firsthand people of great success and them not be happy. Just as I have witnessed those without be completely happy and content. I think that is a blessing, to be able to look at the smallest of things and truly feel happy and appreciate whatever it is or the circumstances that we have and be thankful. Our individual realities are coloured by perception - delight and despair come from within us rather than from outside us.
We have a tendency to judge ourselves on what we have or have not and this ends up with no end of grief. If we can just look at all that we have accomplished without dwelling on our "perceived misfortune" and make each individual circumstance new when we do this we look at things with new light and appreciation, not dwelling on the misfortunes of life. A simple shift in attitude, can help to unearth the potential that is hidden and eliminates the perception that every event, relationship and duty as setbacks or disappointments.
It is human nature to focus on the positive because the universe is often unpredictable and chaotic, so we make the assumptions that the positives will take care of themselves. We become "attached" to the situation at hand and find it difficult to find the positives that are already there, just not clear at that particular moment. But life is really no more or no less than what you make of it, let's say you're working in a job that you dislike, you can choose to continuously attach yourself to the negative aspects of your job and allow them to fester or you can take on and assume a different more positive approach... use the parts of your job that you like as the reward and approach those parts with a sense of newness and gusto. Detaching yourself mentally from the un-pleasantries of the job tasks, so that you can turn it around into something that you do with a fresh sense of newness or love.
This way when something comes about that is really new that brings fear into play, then you can face that as well with the same sense of "newness" and as an opportunity for you to discover something that you are already capable of doing or even going further with the skills.
Similarly, unexpected events, or surprises can be viewed in this light as well and can add as new sense of flavor to your life. Simply by choosing to love life no matter what crosses your path. This will help you to create an atmosphere of jubilance that is wonderfully infections. Change your perspective, change your world... but to do this you must be willing to adopt an optimistic, hopeful mind-set, that can detach itself from trying to "own" every problem or situation that comes your way.
Just to make the decision to be happy is not enough; learn to observe life's complexities through the eyes of a child seeing everything for the first time and not allowing fear to take over. Try looking at yourself in three parts, you in the middle, body on one side and the brain on the other. The part of you in the middle is your true self, the body is the sensations that you feel the events and happenings; the brain is the emotional feelings of the events and happenings. By doing this you can look at life's happenings, events etc., without detachment and truly find the ability to choose happiness, or whatever you want to choose. It will allow you to look at each shift of your life with new perspective, and will bring on more happiness and contentment that will remain within you forever.
We can easily get caught up in the moments that warp our perception of life and how things "should or shouldn't" be. When we do not we can cause ourselves to have panic attacks or stress disorders, self-doubt, etc... here is an exercise that can be applied to almost any ailment, panic attack situation or what have you in life.
Steps to calming a panic attack.
1. Close your eyes. Breathe in. Hold for 8 seconds. Let it out, feeling a release.
2. Say "I am having a panic attack" (acknowledge)
3. Turn your focus TOWARD the sensations.
Say... 'Sensation - you feel heavy, you feel painful, you feel numb'
4. Next... Plant your feet... don't run! Ask the sensation to become WORSE. Tell yourself you can handle this, because... "you can", requesting more intense feeling is like saying bring it on. To FEEL more. This tricks the brain, to make the adrenals move quicker so you can control the flight and fright that you are experiencing. You can do this you have been through panic attacks before! And you are still here. Once the brain realizes that it is ok, that you are not going to die, or whatever it is thinking the "feelings" will begin to subside. Sounds crazy but it works!
5. Ask the sensation what it needs you to know. What is it trying to tell you. Your system is giving you totally accurate information, listen to it!
6. What were you thinking before the panic started? Look for proof that undermines the fear and think supportive thoughts. They are just thoughts, that compile, nothing more... you are ok!
7. Keep a positive aspects journal. Write your fear, then write a positive thought that proves your fear is just a fear.
Breathe through your Panic/anxiety attack
Perform this breath through your nose if possible.
1. Breathe in for 4 seconds
2. Hold your breath for 7 seconds
3. Exhale breath for 8 seconds
4. Repeat a few times
This causes an autonomic nervous system shift from a sympathetic (fight or flight reaction) state to a parasympathetic response.